time and tide,
i'm with the love of my life.
but why is it hard to see his face?
why can't i recognise his voice?

Christmas is here,
i can only long.
long to be seen,
long to be recognised.

it's a few past Christmas,
i sit alone with an unnatural brokenness.
torn.


i want to feel like i belong. but if i do, would i be able to hold onto it?
i want to commit. but yet if i do, how long will it last? how long will I last?
it's hard not to waiver at the slightest hint of weakness.
it's hard not to lust after things that bring no benefit.
it's hard relying on something that is just too unpredictable.
can one differentiate stubbornness from perseverance?

word of the day : confidently wrong